The ABC of Academic Failure: A Phenomenological Study of Academic Failure among Students from Private Universities

This study was conducted by: Celine Dionne Carlos, Leonida Florendo, Berna Kamila Martin and Stephanie Clare Rojas

INTRODUCTION

According to Glasser (1975 as cited in Pickhardt, 2011) failure can have tremendous effects on one’s life. Yet, little attention was given on how people experience multiple academic failures since previous researches in academic failure has been primarily about its causal attributions (McEvoy& Welker, 2000; Le Foll & Rascle, 2006; Lee, 2007; Miller, 1998 as cited in Ojo & Owoyele, 2011). Studying the phenomenon may promote ways on how to deal with people who have failed academics a lot of times since they would have a better understanding of the phenomenon. It is also beneficial in learning contexts since most educators are striving to have a better understvanding how to encourage the students to have more positive self-attitudes after experiencing academic failures (Neff, Hsieh & Dejitterat, 2005). The present study would like to explore students’ multiple academic failure experience to provide insights and rich descriptions about their experience, its effects on them and their attributions of their failure in order for people to address the issues that may occur.

     

METHODS

            The participants for this study are eleven (11) undergraduate students from two private universities in Metro Manila. They are currently in their junior and terminal years who have accumulated multiple (two or more) academic failures during the span of the study. The descriptions of the phenomenon were gathered through conducting five (5) in-depth interviews and one (1) focus group discussion of six (6) people. The data were analyzed by transcribing, reading and re-reading the entire descriptions and listening to the interview tapes. Significant statements were highlighted and examined in order to formulate themes.  In ensuring the validity, the researchers used triangulation where they collected the data from various sources (participants, methods, theories and different investigators). They sorted the descriptions gathered to find common categories and themes and lastly, they eliminated the overlapping areas.

RESULTS

Sub-question 1: What are the effects of the academic failure experience?

Table 1.
Themes for the Effects of the Academic Failure Experience under the Affect, Behavior and Cognition Categories

Theme	Description/Definition	Sample Quote
Shame (AFFECT)	a painful emotion caused by being aware of the individual’s own shortcomings (academic failure)	“Yun nga try to pass the next time kasi nakakahiya.”
More serious and responsible in studies (BEHAVIOR)	allotting more time and effort in studying and complying with academic related requirements.	“I am taking college more serious now than when I first entered college. Well, because the last time I received a failing mark was two years ago which means I’m doing well in my studies now.”
Failure as a hindrance (COGNITION)	negative outlook on the academic failure as it will lead to difficulties and obstruction.	“It meant that I can’t be Cum Laude anymore.”
Failure for personal growth (COGNITION)	positive outlook on the academic failure as it will allow the individual to learn and improve oneself.	“It’s a positive in a way because syempre nadetermine ako lalo na magstudy more and mas lalo ako parang nagising sa truth na kailangan ko talaga mag-aral ng sobra, na college is not a game.”
Acceptance of Failure (COGNITION)	acknowledging the fact that they failed the subject/s.	“Nangyari na eh, wala ka na magagawa dun. Kung nangyari na, nangyari na. Bawi ka na lang next term…”
Failure breeds regrets (COGNITION)	recurrently thinking of what the individual should have done to avoid the academic failure.	“At saka, sayang eh. Sayang yung oras like every subject you fail, parang ‘di ba it delays you from graduating.”

 Note. The themes are divided into three categories: Affect, the changes relating to the participants' moods and feelings caused by the academic failure; Behavior, the changes in actions and conducts of the participants caused by the experience of academic failure; and Cognition, the changes in the participants' thoughts and perceptions caused by their academic failure. The participants felt ashamed after having multiple academic failures but it also led to good changes with regards to their behavior because they became more serious and responsible with their studies. It has positive effects in their thoughts in a way since they took it as an opportunity for growth and just accepted it, on the other hand, they also have negative thoughts towards their academic failures for they thought of it as a hindrance for their goals and it also brought regrets to them at the end.

Sub-question 2: What are the reasons of their academic failure?
Table 2.
Themes for Reasons of their Academic Failure under the External and Internal Categories

Themes	Description/Definition	Sample Quote
Inefficiency of professors (EXTERNAL)	explanations of academic failure that involve the participants’ issues about their professors.	“Professors sometimes don’t know how to teach. They sometimes don’t care if the students learned something or not.”
Difficulty of subject (EXTERNAL)	high levels of struggle or stress that participants experience in complying with the requirements of the subjects.	“I think sometimes they just have a really hard time with the subject. I mean, sometimes it’s not really their forte… they are not that interested in the subject as well…”
Distractions (EXTERNAL)	activities, people or things that hinder the participants to perform better in their classes.	“daming hindrance eh. Andyan yung partying, friends na minsan B.I. sa’yo. Kaya minsan nawawala ka sa focus”
Inability to manage time (INTERNAL)	incompetence in using time efficiently.	“Walang time management. Syempre kaya naman pero … (inaudible)”
Absenteeism (INTERNAL)	unable to attend classes (intentional or unintentional)	“I had FDA – failure due to absence… it was my decision not to go to that class so definitely I expected that I would fail the subject.”

Note. The themes are divided into two categories: External, the explanations of the participants' academic failure that are attributed to their environment or situation; and Internal, the explanations of the participants' academic failure that are attributed to the participants themselves. They usually attribute their academic failures to the professors, subjects, distractions, having no time management and not attending classes.

Research question: How do students from private universities experience academic failure?
Table 3.
Themes for the Experience of Academic Failure under the Affect, Behavior and Cognition Categories

Themes	Description/Definition	Sample Quote
Disappointed (AFFECT)	being strongly displeased with the academic failure.	“I’m not used to failing, I usually can handle schoolwork and pass. But then you know, if I set my mind into it, I usually can do it that’s why I was so hurt when I didn’t (pass the subject).”
Anxiety (AFFECT)	a strong feeling of worry; being uneasy with the academic failure.	“Nung first time, sobrang napraning ako  kasi I promised my parents na wala akong bagsak… I felt scared lalo na on the succeeding failures. Kasi right after the failures, I keep promising my parents na hindi na ulit ako babagsak.”
Annoyance (AFFECT)	a strong feeling of anger; being greatly displeased with the experience of academic failure.	"Sobrang galit ako nung time na yun that’s why I opted to just keep quiet then I tried to look back on the whole term”
Communicating with others (BEHAVIOR)	talking to other people to inform   them about their academic failure and to seek comfort, help and advices.	“Calling my friends and saying ‘bro, I failed’ then I had to tell my parents…”
Self-talk (BEHAVIOR)	self motivation through talking to   oneself.	“I just told my self lang don’t let it bother you kasi you know, you can bounce back.”
Distracting self to forget (BEHAVIOR)	diverting one’s attention to other   tasks instead of thinking about the academic failure.	“I cried really really bad and I felt so bad I baked so many cookies.”
Acceptance (COGNITION)	consenting with the idea of failure	“I just accepted it. I can’t do anything about it anymore…”
Decrease in self-efficacy (COGNITION)	decline in the confidence that an individual has over his abilities and knowledge.	I felt guilty na parang that was my only job. I mean, I’m provided with everything and my only job was to pass and I couldn’t even do that so I felt like I’m a failure.
Optimism (COGNITION)	looking at the academic failure in   a more positive note	“Definitely not fun, but these experience are sometimes needed to help a person grow as an individual.”
Regrets (COGNITION)	recurrent thoughts about the academic failure, which leads to resentment and disappointment of the experience.	“Syempre nung una akala mo okay lang pero nung tumagal maiisip mo sayang yung pera, sayang yung oras kung kelan gagraduate ka na, mapapatagal ka pa ng apat na terms.”

Note. The themes are divided into three categories: Affect, the experiences of academic failure that concern the participants' emotions and feelings; Behavior, the experiences of academic failure that involve the patterns of their actions and conducts; and Cognition, the experiences that involve the participants’ thoughts and perceptions.  They have negative emotions during the experience and these emotions brought them to have talks with other people and/or to themselves and they also keep themselves busy with other activities for them not to constantly think about their academic failures. They have thoughts wherein they just accepted it and just have a positive outlook about it and negative thoughts as well, wherein their self-efficacy decreased and they had regrets about the experience.

CONCLUSION, DISCUSSION, RECOMMENDATIONS

There’s a great impact on the affect, cognition and behavior among students from private universities who experienced multiple academic failure, and generally, the themes were found to be consistent with some studies done in the past. In fact, the themes were found to be highly related to Kubler-Ross Model of the Five (5) Stages of Grief (1969): denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. In addition, students generally feel disappointed, anxious and annoyed whenever they experience failure supported by the affective reactions to academic failure found in other studies which further suggests that students do not feel pleased with failure (Le Foll & Rascle, 2006; Miller, 1998 as cited in Ojo & Owoyele, 2011; Gracia & Jenkins, 2002). These emotions are said to further influence their way of thinking, the decisions they make, and the way they act (Adolphs & Damasio, 2001; Ciarrochi et al, 2001 as cited in Gracia & Jenkins, 2002) and in this particular study, the students’ way of thinking is affected such that with the experience, students generally accept and are able to keep their optimism with regards to their experience of academic failure, though it was also found that having regrets and decreasing self-efficacy were also common among students undergoing failure in academics. Moreover, certain coping mechanisms were observed such that students usually communicate with other people, undergo self-talk and distract themselves in order to forget their academic failure which are really common among students experiencing academic failure as seen in the study of Neff et al (2005). And finally, they also attribute their failures in both internal factors (Le Foll and Rascle, 2006; Miller, 1998 as cited in Ojo & Owoyele, 2011) including lack of motivation, inability to manage time and absenteeism,  as well as to external factors (Duran, 1991; Lee, 2007; Le Foll and Rascle, 2006; Miller, 1998 as cited in Ojo & Owoyele, 2011) such as inefficiency of professors, difficulty of subjects and distractions. And yet, for a more in depth and richer analysis of the experience of academic failure, the next researchers may include not only students from private schools but also the public schools for more generalized results. They may use other qualitative approaches such as Grounded Theory in order to have more in depth results - the explanations of the student’s affect, behavior, cognition and consequences for further individual action and interpersonal relations. Lastly, they could also study the difference of the experiences of academic failure in minor and major subjects.

REFERENCES

Gracia, L. & Jenkins, E. (2002). An exploration of student failure on an undergraduate accounting programme of study. Accounting Education 11 (1), 93–107 (2002)

Kübler-Ross, E. (1969). On death and dying. Retrieved August 19, 2012 from http://www.scribd.com/doc/6512450/Five-Stages-of-Grief

McEvoy, A. & Welker, R. (2000). Antisocial behavior, academic failure and school climate: A critical review. Journal of Emotional and Behavioral Disorders. Vol. 8. No. 3. pp. 130-140

Neff, K., Hsieh, Y. & Dejitterat, K. (2005). Self-compassion, achievement goals, and coping with academic failure. Self and Identity, 4 263 – 287, 2005 DOI: 10.1080/13576500444000317

Ojo, A. & Owoyele, J. (2011). Causal attributions and affective reactions to academic failure among undergraduates in the Nigerian Premier University of Education. European Journal of Scientific Research, Vol.52 No.3 (2011), pp.406-412

Omar, A. & Alrubayea, A. (2012). Investigating student academic failure at the College of Applied Studies and Community Services (CASCS). The 2012 Orlando International Academic Conference. Retrieved August 17, 2012, fromhttp://conferences.cluteonline.com/index.php/IAC/2012DW/paper/viewFile/889/898

Pickhardt, C. (2011). Adolescence and failure. Psychology Today. Retrieved August 18,2012, from http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201109/adolescence-and-failure

A Different Kind of Relationship: A Qualitative Study about the Phenomenon of Flirtationship

This study was conducted by: Chan, R., Chiaoco, M., Couderc, K., Tan, S. and Tangtatco, J.

INTRODUCTION

Flirtationship  is considered to be one of the most evident and prominent kind of relationship nowadays. In relation to this, the group decided to take into account this phenomenon. Since this phenomenon is new to many, the group decided to pursue with the topic due to curiosity because of the growing number of people around the researchers that are involved in flirtationship. In addition to this, the group wanted to be able to contribute to the research academe by being able to provide a framework on the theoretical background of flirtationship. This research paper focuses on the process and benefits of being in a flirtationship. Flirtationship is defined as greater than a friendship but less than a real relationship (Kemmer, 2008). It is a connection with someone who captures your attention but lacks long-term involvement and commitment. On the other hand, Bedi (2012) stated that being in a relationship is not just for fun but it is a serious thing in which you invest your time and effort to stay loyal with your partner. Being in a flirtationship does not require you to stick to only one partner (Lou, 2008). The main reason why people stay in a flirtationship is to have the freedom of having multiple partners. In an article of Moras (2012), the author discussed about the advantages and disadvantages of being in a flirtationship. Some of the advantages of being in this kind of relationship are always having someone who will listen to you, no need for long phone calls and texting, not obliged to give expensive gifts, and lastly there is no actual commitment involved. On the other hand, some of the disadvantages of being in a flirtationship are not having a real commitment and having the guilt of leading your partner on.

METHODS

11 students from different universities participated in the study. 5 of which participated in our one-on-one interview while the remaining 6 participants participated in the focus group discussion. In the data gathering, the researchers first performed a literature review regarding flirtationship. This is necessary to help formulate the questions needed to address the objectives and the research questions of the study. The researchers created a data collection tool, which includes questions for the interview and focus group discussion. After which, the researchers looked for possible participants who are currently having a flirtationship kind of relationship. Interviews and focus group discussion were recorded and transcribed into a written text. A common approach that is used by phenomenology is to extract the themes from the interview strands. The researchers examined each transcript for possible themes to understand the nature of the phenomenon and the participant's personal experiences. The researchers identified significant statements then linked each to a specific theme. Through the use of triangulation, the researchers sorted the data systematically to find and determine common themes by eliminating the areas that overlap. The data reached a point of saturation, where no other themes are emerging.

RESULTS

Table 1.1
The themes presented below answers the question “Why do adolescents opt to be in a flirtationship rather than a relationship?”

Themes	Definition	Exemplar Quote
Unpreparedness in dealing with commitment	Not ready to commit into a serious relationship	“I don’t get disappointed too much and don’t expect much in this relationship.” “It’s like we are just having fun and nothing really so serious.”
Open relationship	The liberty to have as many partners as you want	“Because in a flirtationship you don’t have to be committed to only one person”
Absence of love	No emotional investment is needed to have the relationship	“For me, you can’t fall in love in this kind of relationship.” “Hoping no one starts to fall”
Increases self-concept	Increases the confidence and boosts the ego of a person from the satisfying experience	“happy is not what I feel, it’s being satisfied.” “of course, when I get what I want from a relationship I will feel fulfilled and satisfied” FGD: “flirt for satisfaction” “to boost one’s ego”
Going with the flow	A state wherein not a lot of effort is exerted for a certain situation to happen but just waits and sees for whatever happens.	“- let it be and see how it will unfold” “- you cannot plan out the actual outcome of having a flirtationship”
Fear of getting hurt	No  obligation to invest emotions to avoid hurt.	“less disappointment” “Less heartache” FGD: “if it doesn’t work out, it wouldn’t be that hurtful

This table explains the reasons why adolescents opt to stay in a flirtationship rather a real relationship. Reasons as to which they opt to stay are their commitment issues, the liberty of having an open relationship, the absence of love, an increase in one’s self-esteem, being able to go with the flow and the fear of getting hurt.

Table 1.2
The following set of themes gives the definition and meaning of the phenomenon, which answers the research question, “What is flirtationship?”

Themes	Definition	Exemplar Quote
Involves no commitment	Does not demand for exclusivity, responsibility, disappointments and loyalty	“No commitment, I don’t have to text her everyday, I don’t need to ask permission if I have to go somewhere, I handle my own time.”
Focuses primarily on physical benefits	Expects physical contact from the partner to achieve temporary satisfaction	“Nothing crazy haha we just talk, hold hands or hug things like that”…”watch movies, eat, tell stories, stuff like that” FGD: “puro sarap”, “friends with benefits”
Multiple flirtationship partners	Flirting relationship with as many individuals as desired without having to consider emotional attachment	“a relationship between a number of people” “That’s why it’s called a FLIRTationship, when you flirt and you are a flirt; you don’t have to flirt with only one person, eventually you would end up flirting with others as well.” “Since you guys are not exclusive then why stick to one.”
Just for fun	Doing things out of physical excitement	“A flirtationship feels like we’re just playing” FGD:  “for fun”, “past time”
Temporary relationship	A relationship wherein there are no expectations on being long term	“A relationship that would certainly not last long..something that’s just temporary..like a “spur of the moment.’’
Begins with friendship	Friendship opens the doors to give individuals an opportunity to start a flirtationship	“It starts with being good friends”

This table defines relationship in the context of it being a new kind of relationship. Flirtationship is defined as a relationship which does not involve commitment, focuses on the physical benefits, being able to have multiple partners, it is merely a relationship of fun, it is a temporary relationship and that it begins with a friendship.


CONCLUSION, DISCUSSION, RECOMMENDATIONS

Based on the data gathered from the interviews and focus group discussions, adolescents opt to choose to stay in a flirtationship rather than a relationship, for the reasons that they are not yet prepared in dealing with commitment, they are afraid that they will be disappointed, and they have the liberty to have as many partners as they desire. These adolescents consider flirtationship as a relationship wherein it is something that is not serious, just merely for fun. They defined flirtationship as a state wherein the people involved are not exclusive, have no responsibility for one another’s actions and do not require loyalty. The findings of this study show that a flirtationship is a phenomenon wherein it is a certain kind of temporary relationship that does not involve commitment and emotional attachment due to it being based mostly on physical companionship. The group recommends the future researchers of the study to expand the sample size as it would help in being able to gather more data for the research and lessen the probability of generalized conclusion. Researchers should also include people from different age groups as to have a comparision between them. Future researchers could also take into account other factors such as self-esteem, interpersonal trust, self-confidence, self-concept, and emotional maturation that could affect the stand of the participants through the use of quantitative research.

REFERENCES

Bedi, P. (2012, July 29). Heard of flirtationship?. The Times of India. Retrieved August 10,

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Churchill, A. (2012). More than a friendship, less than a relationship – You're in a

Flirtationship. Hercampus. Retrieved August 18, 2012 from http://www.hercampus.com/love/more-friendship-less-relationship-youre-flirtationship

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2012 from http://www.examiner.com/article/knowing-your-role-your-relationship

Henningsen, D. D., Braz, M., & Davies, E. (2008). WHY DO WE FLIRT? Flirting

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Dictionary. Retrieved August 10, 2012, from http://neologisms.rice.edu/index.php?a=term&d=1&t=9806

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co-workers: Perceptions of relational and emotional messages, inappropriateness,

and sexual harassment. Journal of Applied Communication Research, 29,

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Lou, L. (2008, October 15). FLIRTATIONSHIPS: Every great relationship starts with a

flirtationship. FLIRTATIONSHIPS. Retrieved August 1, 2012, from

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Available from http://www.m-w.com/dictionary/flirtation.

Morris, J. (2005, October 26). Ten signs of a serious relationship. EzineArticles

Submission - Submit Your Best Quality Original Articles For Massive Exposure, Ezine Publishers Get 25 Free Article Reprints. Retrieved August 10, 2012, from http://ezinearticles.com/?Ten-Signs-of-a-Serious-Relationship&id=87528

Moras, A. (2012, March 2). A Flirtationship- Neither just a friendship…. Nor just a

relationship. « Living It…. Living It…. Retrieved August 5, 2012, from

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hip-nor-just-a-relationship/

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2KnowMySelf | The Ultimate Source for Understanding Yourself and others. Retrieved August 12, 2012, from http://www.2knowmyself.com/signs_of_a_serious_relationship/how_to_tell_if_he_is_serious_about_the_relationship

Spira, J. (2012). How to know if you’re in flirtationship mode. Cyber-dating Expert.

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Can We Just Be Friends? A Qualitative Study on Friend zone Phenomenon

by: Riza Cuartero,

Gail Guiang ,

Lanz Olives,

Klein Sze

 

INTRODUCTION

Friend zone is an emerging term that describes the phenomenon between people who are in the state of uncertainty regarding their stand in the relationship (Adjei, 2012). Given that relationships are an inevitable part of human nature and people often tend to misinterpret “friendly behavior” in heterosexual friendships, this often becomes a challenge to both the one who wants to take the relationship to the next level and the one who doesn’t in terms of keeping the friendship (Bleske & Buss, 2000). In this paper, the researchers will aim to develop an academic description of the friend zone phenomenon and will attempt to explain the process people go through when they decide to put someone in the friend zone.

METHOD

This study used a purposive sampling where participants were selected based on their characteristics, provided that they had put someone in the friend zone. The researchers gathered 11 participants (10 female, 1 male). Five of them were interviewed and the other half were sent to a Focused Group Discussion (FGD). Phenomenology (i.e. descriptions of the experiences) and Grounded Theory (i.e. explanation of the nature and process of friend zone based from the participants) were used to analyze data while triangulation (i.e. cross verification of statements from two or more participants), disconfirming evidence (i.e. conflicting themes were all acknowledged to prove the absence of absence of bias), and member checking (i.e. participants were asked about the content of transcripts to ensure credibility of the data) were used to ensure validity.

RESULT

What is the friend zone phenomenon?

These are the themes that emerged from the first research question, which aimed to discover what the “friend zone phenomenon” is for the participants of the research.

Theme	Definition/description	Sample quote
Advanced refusal of a romantic pursuit	Stopping the person from further pursuit of achieving the next level of the current relationship.	"Friend zone, parang iadvance, sasabihin mo na siya na bawal na ganyan, ganyan kasi friends lang talaga"
Misperception of an individual’s romantic interest	Wrongly perceiving target's interests in the person who is friend zoned	"kunwari nagshoshow ng affection yung isa pero sa isa parang normal lang. ok, yung pag treat ko sayo pareho lang sa ibang guy friends"
False expectations regarding the potential of the relationship to grow	Believing that something good can possibly happen even without concrete reasons of its existence	"Siguro pag masyado nag expect yung isa pero wala naman talaga"
Borderline between platonic relationship and romantic relationship	A situation where the possibility of taking the relationship to the next level is ambiguous to no chance at all	"Ang friend zone, parang ito yung mundo na kinakatakutan ng mga lalake"
Polite refusal	Declining the offer of courtship in a pleasant manner	"I think isa sa mga factors ng friend zone, kunwari ayaw mo sa guy pero nice guy. Parang it’s a nice way of putting (rejecting) him in…"

 

According to the reports of the participants, the “friend zone phenomenon” is a form of refusal people use when they seem to lack the desire of taking the friendship to the next level. It is a stage where one attempts to stop the romantic pursuit of their friend while maintaining the relationship as it is.

What are the reasons behind the friend zone phenomenon?

These are the themes the researchers were able to discover when they were addressing why individuals usually put people in the “friend zone”.

Theme	Definition/description	Sample quote
Friends’ and family's perceptions regarding the pursuer	Putting into consideration the opinion of one's friends and family	"Kasi siguro influence ng friends kaya ako natuturn off"
Parents' expectations	They want to achieve the standards of the parents	"Oo, parents, parents na ano kailangan may stable job ka muna bago magrelationship"
Presumption of relationship outcome/progress	Sudden achievement of a sense of how one wants the relationship to be.	"mararamdaman mo yun eh, may mga tao na ano eh, yung you two are better of as friends rather than something intimate"
Academic Priorities	The focus is on the sustenance and/or improvement of grades and overall academic performance	"Eh kasi nga dapat graduate na tayo"
Career Priorities	The focus is not to miss any chances into being employed first	Oo, parents, parents. Na ano kailangan may stable job ka muna bago mag relationship
Past Romantic Experiences	Being familiar with romantic relationships and learning from one's knowledge.	"Mas gusto kong friends lang parang kasi pag naging kayo or ano, masisira lang yung friendship niyo pag nag-away kayo. Yun yung realization ko ng pagkakaroon ng boyfriend, mas okay ng maging friends"
Race / Ethnicity	Preference of a specific culture/lineage	"Uhm, studies tapos tradition ng family, kunyari yung Pilipino, wala sandali lang, ayoko na sa kanya"
Inconsistent expression of affection	The amount of care and attention is not received on a regular basis	"Basta nandon yung nagpaparamdam, eh kasi baka mamaya wala lang, kikilos lang siya pag naggraduate na kami ganon, parang inaantay nalang yung oras, kasi mas malaki yung possibility na mawala yung feelings kapag huminto siya"
Age Preference	Having an ideal age when choosing a partner	"Nakakaturn off din yun pag masyado matanda. Sad kasi pag matanda"
Physical attractiveness	Importance of appearance when choosing a partner	Kasi yun naman yung basis talaga eh, pangalawa na lang yung ugali. Pangalawa na lang yung ugali. Parang for me yung factor talaga yung mukha eh.
Over familiarity	Being too accustomed to the person to the point that it is already unimaginable for your relationship to turn romantic	"you’re too comfortable with him as in parang hindi mo na siya iniisip na ganun"

The researchers were able to discover that there were a number of factors which people put into consideration when they decide to put someone in the “friend zone”. This usually includes attractiveness, traditions, and influences of other people. However, despite these factors which are more external in nature, there are also people who rely on personal experiences, priorities and self-reflection on the relationship.

What are the lived experiences?

The researchers were able to discover common experiences people usually go through before, during and after individuals put someone in the “friend zone”.

Theme	Definition/description	Sample quote
Intimate confrontation	The use of reason which can compensate the situation with the use of compliments and prep talk	"Sinasabe ko na marami pang okay dyan, ganyan"
Adopting a humorous approach	The use of humor in confronting the person to stop the romantic pursuit	"Lolokohin mo minsan na hindi kita type, hindi mo rin naman ako type. Magkaibigan lang tayo."
Maintenance of platonic relationship	The belief that one is more suited to adopt the "friend" only role in his/her life than something else	"Kasi friends lang talaga tingin ko sayo"
Platonic Sibling Relationship	The belief that one is more suited to adopt the "brother/sister" role in his/her life than something else	"Tingin ko sa kanya parang sister lang"
Former-platonic friend relationship	Relationship started as a platonic friendship	"Syempre nangstart friends, tapos nung tumagal parang naging close tapos nanligaw"
Friendly Dates	Hanging out together without labeling it as a date o tainting the night out with any romantic associations	"Tapos may time na parang kasi parang napag-usapan namin na tinatanong din daw siya ng mga kapatid niya kung ano ba daw meron? Tapos ang sinasagot niya lang daw friends. Oh di sige friends. So para sa akin parang friends pero siyempre alam mo na yung mga efforts niya as in ganyan parang as in halos everyday kami lumalabas ganyan."
Indirect Confession	The one who was friend zoned indirectly/ambiguously showed his feelings towards his friend	"Ang tanga ko kasi lahat ng friends ko, literally lahat ng friends ko kahit hindi ko kaibigan"
Generalized Treatment	How the person relates and deals with other people is the same as with the one who she/he friend zoned	"tapos meron iba na kunwari sa is among friend sweet ka, tapos sweet ka pala sa lahat, dun mo narerealize na ah, generalized lang yung feeling"
Consideration of Romantic Potential	Thinking about giving the person a chance to escalate the relationship to a romantic one	First year pa lang. So parang ako naisip ko na “wow, 1st year pa lang may gusto na siya sa akin tapos 3rd year lang nag effort.” Naisip ko sa utak ko na pano kaya kung naging kami.
Following the natural course of events	When the person is unsure of the meaning his/her friends' actions so he/she just follows to see where it is headed	"Ang tricky nga nila eh, like yung isa, sabi niya “Justine, anjan yung ex ko na ka-thing.” Tapos sabi niya “cross tayo para Makita niyang meron akong bago” ganon. Eh ako naman, as a friend, nakipag cross"
Friendship rewards and privileges	The benefits received from the friends only relationship such as gifts, time, etc.	Meron pang benefits, syempre gusto ka niya. Masama pero halimbawa, “uy libre mo ako”

Based on the data gathered, individuals who put people in the “friend zone” all go through a process wherein it all starts from being friends, which eventually progresses to having the friend exhibit desires of taking the relationship to the next level and having to devise ways on how to decline the pursuit while maintaining the friendship. Along the process, some benefits are derived but the goal of maintaining the relationship is constant throughout reports of the participants.

What is the outcome?

These are the themes that emerged when the researchers attempted to discover what usually happens to the friendship after individuals put their friend in the “friend zone”.

Theme	Definition/description	Sample quote
Increased time for activities	Period where the focus is academics and friends	"More time sa friends ayun. Tsaka focus the studies"
Longevity of friendship	Kept the relationship as it is will make the friendship better	"Mas masaya lang yung after effects (of friendzone) kasi mas magiging friends kayo, mas nagiging close kayo"
Emotional Maturity	Learning how to handle situations well	"Benefits ko? Mas nag mature ako, mas alam ko na yung gagawin ko tapos mas marami akong friends!"
Happiness in the long run	Future benefit for both parties (one who is friend zoned and the one who does the friend zone)	"Siguro sa umpisa it's not gonna make you happy but in long run, it will (being friend zoned)"
Guilt feelings	Sensing that you have done something wrong to the person	"Pero syempre nakakaawa din sa part nila"
Increased self-esteem	The heightened sense of importance / value	kasi parang “hala nanreject ka, ikaw na, ang haba ng hair mo”
Less guilt	Feeling that one has done something wrong but negative feelings is compensated by reasons which makes the action "acceptable"	"Less guilty ka, kasi parang yun na yung nicest way para/kesa sabihing “Hanggang friends lang tayo kasi ang pangit mo”
Tainted Friendship	The quality of friendship has changed in a negative way	"It was never the same! (friendship). Wala, parang naging bitter na rin siguro siya"
Relational Limitations	The friendship was kept but certain boundaries were made	"May wall na eh"

Results have shown that people who put their friend in the “friend zone” usually draw their attention more on the positive outcomes compared to the negative ones. They claim that they manage to have more time for productive activities, they were able to keep the friendship despite changes in the relationship and that they were able to make the person feel better compared to outright rejection.

CONCLUSION, DISCUSSION AND RECOMMENDATION

In conclusion, the friend zone phenomenon is the attempt of the individual who does not want to take the relationship to the next level; to stop the romantic pursuit of their friend; and try to maintain the relationship as it is. This usually occurs because of several factors that are both external and internal in nature. This results in both positive and negative outcomes, wherein the positive effects seem to outweigh all the negative effects.

Female participants defined the friend zone phenomenon as an “advance refusal of a romantic pursuit and a pleasant rejection”; also it poses as a form of relationship maintenance - effort to keep a relationship according to what both parties want out of it (Guerrero & Chaves, 2005). One of the straightforward bases in looking for quality partners in a relationship is looking at observable characteristics such as physical appearance, other reasons consists of social pressures from parents and peers (La Greca & Mackey, 2004; Connolly, Furman & Konarski 2000; Baumeister, Wotman, & Stillwell, 1993). Although the relationship starts as platonic, due to familiarity, the receiving end of the friend zone tries to implicitly communicate their romantic feelings and intentions to the other person. At the same time, the giving end tries to implicitly reject the friend with the use of negative relationship maintenance (e.g. avoidance, downgrading of sexuality). Though it created guilt feelings because of the person’s reluctance in inflicting pain in the person, the giving end tries to justify their actions in order to lessen that guilt (Baumeister, Wotman, & Stillwell, 1993). This eventually results in positive and negative outcomes (e.g. increase in self-esteem, tainted friendship, occurrence of boundaries, guilt feelings). This is to maintain the friendly relationship as it is.

It is recommended that future researchers gather an equal number of male and female participants so that biased data will not be gathered. Data will also be better authenticated and validated if a process that aims to minimize the effects of social desirability bias is implemented. With this, participants shall not have the means to fabricate their data to suit their desires. Lastly, the researchers recommend that “friend zone” phenomenon be studied from the receivers end.

REFERENCES

Adjei, A. (May 29, 2012) The ‘new’ friend zone. ACIRFA Magazine. Retrieved from: http://acirfamag.com/?p=2797.

Baumeister, R.F., Wotman, S.R., & Stillwell, A.M. (1993). Unrequited love: On heartbreak, anger, guilt, scriptlessness and humiliation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 64 (3), 377-394.

Bleske, A. & Buss, D. (2000). Can men and women be just friends? Personal Relationship, 7, 131-151.

Connolly, Furman, & Konarski (2000). The role of peers in the emergence of heterosexual romantic relationships in adolescents. Child Development, 71 (5), pp. 1395-1408.

Guerrero, L. & Chavez, A. (2005). Relational maintenance in cross-sex friendships characterized by different types of romantic intent: An exploratory study. Western Journal of Communication, 69 (4), pp. 339-358.

La Greca, A.M., & Mackey, E.R. (2004). Adolescents’ anxiety in dating situations: The role of other-sex friends, close friends, and romantic partners. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology. 1-28.

Nicholson, J. (2011, December 16). Escape the friend zone: From friend to girlfriend or boyfriend.  Retrieved from http://www.psychologytoday./blog/the-attraction-doctor.